My Girl Gang

The five women I write about below are my go-to motivators, tough lovers, and get out of your own wayers. I keep their books on my bedside for whenever I need reminding that I am a badass who can do hard things with a strong back, soft front, and wild heart. I have learned so much about myself from their art, and from how they show up in the world as authentic and intentionally themselves.

• Brené Brown: for when I need to be reminded of my strength, especially through vulnerability. Favorite quote: “If you put shame in a petri dish, it needs three ingredients to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence, and judgement. If you put the same amount of shame in the petri dish and douse it with empathy, it can’t survive.”

• Jen Sincero: for when I need some tough love and to get out of my own way already. Favorite quote: “If you wanna stay stuck in the same place & keep getting spanked with the same lessons over and over, be negative, resentful, and victimized. If you want to get over your issues and rock your life, be grateful, look for the good, and learn.”

• Glennon Doyle: for when I need to be reminded I am enough just as I am. I have gifted Glennon’s book, Untamed, to several women in my life. I consider it required reading, especially for young women.   Favorite Quote: “Every time you’re given a choice between disappointing someone else and yourself, your duty is to disappoint that someone else. Your job, throughout your entire life, is to disappoint as many people as it takes to avoid disappointing yourself.”

• Morgan Harper Nichols: for when I need to feel seen and heard. My favorite poem, below, was the background on my phone throughout my treatment for breast cancer. Her simple and eloquent writing has helped me feel seen even in my darkest moments. Her mountainsdid not break herInstead, they only shaped her,and gave her an all new hope to see:She is stronger than she ever thought she’d be.

• Brandi Carlile: for when I need to be reminded of who I am. Although not a book, Brandi’s music has been playing in the background of my life since I was eighteen, and her music has shown up for me in the seemingly trivial moments as well as the transformational ones. My current favorite song is Crowded Table by the High Women(Brandi’s country music group): I want a house with a crowded table

  And a place by the fire for everyone

  Let us take on the world while we're young and able

  And bring us back together when the day is done.